Christmas Time is Here!

So...I don't really know what I want to write about, but since I'm allowed to ramble here goes.
I absolutely love Christmas time; the snow, hot chocolate, and cute boots. But to me it never really feels like Christmas until I go home. Tomorrow morning I will finally get to Montana. It seems like I have been looking forward to going home for FOREVER. Even though it will be a pretty short break, I can't wait to be with my family because I have the greatest family ever! (They won't believe I said this cuz sometimes I'm pretty cranky)
Here's what I'm looking forward to (in order of importance):
FOOD-I am so sick of cooking for myself
Acting like a kid instead of being in charge of kids
Movies
Shopping (maybe I can talk my parents into buying me more cute boots)
Laughing until I cry because my fam is insane
Crying just because I can
Not dealing with stinky kids who whine all the time
Getting family pictures (we haven't taken them in an eternity)
Playing with my nephew

I am hoping this break will be just what I need. I am going bonkers and I think if I had to teach for one more day a child would die. School was canceled today which made me happy...kinda. I had already driven over 45 minutes to get there and they didn't decide to cancel school until 7:45; school starts at 8:00. To protest that I had to go to school and then come straight home, I slept the day away. I was sticking it to the man by not doing any school work. Well, I better go pack. If you know me then you know that packing is not one of my strengths. I tend to make my suitcases weigh 75 pounds without even realizing it and without packing everything I want to.

As my girl Tracey would say PEACE AND BLESSINGS

AHHH!!

So here is what I look like on the outside:

Calm, cool, collected; you'd think I've got it together...

FALSE

Here's what my insides look like:

I feel as though I am always on the verge of a serious meltdown. Teaching junior high is a lot harder than it sounds. I am sometimes up all night worrying about how my lesson is gonna go, or wondering if a certain student will be at school or if his family problems will keep him home again.

To be honest, I would love to be going through finals week right now. I'm probs the weirdest person around. I have forgotten what it feels like to be a college kid. I wish I could have a week where I was back taking classes and staying up until all hours of the night. Instead, here I am counting the minutes until my 9:00 bed time. WHAT HAVE I BECOME? Oh yeah, an adult...barf. That's how I feel about that. Don't get me wrong, I adore most of my 230+ students, but sometimes I wish I could turn back the clock and play for a little bit longer. I'm at such a weird spot in life. I'm on my own, but don't want to be. I have a real life job, but it scares the crud out of me daily. I yearn for a social life, but don't have the time or energy to put in the effort that I need to. So what does all of that mean? I just do my best everyday to make it without crying. I try to laugh until it hurts because that makes everything better, even if only for a little while. I talk to my mama and daddy everyday because they keep me grounded and moving forward. In the end, the best you can do is try...and that's about all I can do right now.

I guess what I'm trying to say is life is kinda hard and I'm sorry to my long lost friends. Here's a shout out/ apology to you. I'm not dead, just REALLY busy. I would rather be playing with you instead of telling pubescent boys to quit hitting each other and stop distracting the girls from getting their work done. But I know that it is all worth it! I am going through growing pains right now and that just means I'll come out the other side better, stronger, and hopefully a lot closer to the Lord.

Well...here goes!

It's Friday night at 10:43 and I decided there would never be a better time to jump on the band wagon that we call blogging! I have no idea what I'm doing or what I am supposed to say, but here goes. The following is a list of things I learned today.
1. A lot of times I am the only one who thinks I'm funny, but as long as someone is laughing I'm ok.
2. I really miss my family right now. I wish I had a time machine to speed up the next 10 days so I could just get home already.
3. Being a junior high teacher is an adventure...you never know what is going to happen. Today I got hit in the face with a soccer ball while I was supervising a before school game. It didn't feel very awesome at all and my face was bright red for an hour.
Well, that's all I've got. Now I'll just sit by my phone waiting for Prince Charming to call...I'm thinking that means I'll probs be on my butt all night.